How
to End Your
Relationship Gently
Ending a relationship is, without a doubt,
one of the worst things that someone can do, and it makes us feel
miserable in general. It's hard, and even if we have few feelings
for the person, ending the relationship just makes us feel bad in
general. We're hurting someone, and it hurts.
Breaking it gently to someone, and letting
them know that, yes, you're over, is difficult... but it can be
done.
Don't Use the Same Ol' Same Ol'
"It's not you. It's me."
That's embarrassing. And if you've never been
told that, you're very lucky. You shouldn't be telling someone else
that, and even if it is true, it's a cliché that makes everyone
involved feel uncomfortable.
Avoid the typical, cheesy movie lines that
make you want to leave the room quickly, and tell them something
that they deserve to hear. Degrading your ex partner with a line
that's been used a hundred times, and made fun of many more, will
hurt her and hurt you.
Honesty is Key
You've heard this time and time again... but
the reason that you've heard it is because it's true. When you're
about to break up with someone, you need to be honest about your
reasons.
Don't love them anymore? Tell them. Cheated?
Tell them. Explain why you're breaking it off, because it's important
that they know - not only because they deserve the truth, but because
it will end with a cleaner note. If she thinks that there is a chance,
she might not be able to move on.
Don't Pop it in
"Yeah, I really enjoyed the movie too...
oh yeah, I love that song... oh, by the way, I don't want to be
with you anymore, any chance you could get your stuff out of my
trunk?"
That's not a good option, and that's going
to make her feel unhappy with herself, and your previous relationship.
Don't just slip it in, after you've been talking for a while - sit
her down, tell it straight, and get it over with.
It can hurt her more if you don't.
Think About It
Think about how you're going to break up with
your partner - and try to imagine yourself in their shoes, with
how they feel your relationship is going, and how they feel about
you. Being dumped can be rough - very rough - and you need to try
to put yourself in their shoes.
Imagine if it was you, and she was going to
be dumping you. How would you want to be handled? How would you
feel?
Keep it in mind, because this is key when you
need to let her down easy.
Overall...
Breaking up is hard to do. Make sure you're
gentle, and caring, and let her know that you're going to be there
for her no matter what... that's all that matters, after all.
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